This Fucking Guy: Elon Musk
New Shit Has Come To Light
The Dude is sitting with his White Russian watching SPCX open on the Nasdaq. Today Elon Musk becomes the world’s first trillionaire. The Dude has been aware this was coming.
Quick inventory of what else is also true today: the person being minted as history’s richest human has been posting Great Replacement theory on his own platform for two straight years. Not ambiguously — responding “100%” to posts predicting white men will be slaughtered. Calling it “simply a statement of fact.” Hosting Germany’s far-right AfD leader on X and declaring only the AfD can save Germany. It’s a whole thing, man.
His AI has been publicly replying to women’s posts with sexualized images of them. Users typed “remove her school outfit” in the comment threads. Grok complied. Public reply, visible to everyone. Musk posted laughing emojis. Jackie Treehorn would be proud.
New shit has also come to light regarding Jeffrey Epstein. Musk spent years telling the world he had “REFUSED” every invitation to the island and pushed harder than anyone for the files’ release. The files were released. They include his emails from 2012 and 2013 asking Epstein what night on the island would have the “wildest party.” He led the parade. His name was in the files.
He also cut the program monitoring flesh-eating parasites working their way north through Central America. The flesh-eating parasites are now in Texas. First confirmed US livestock case since 1966. This is what happens, man. This is what happens.
About that stock. Starlink is the rug — real revenue, really ties the room together. But SPCX comes bundled with X, which makes about half what Twitter did in 2021, and xAI, which burns through a billion dollars a month and has been called a cash furnace so many times the name has stuck. All of it folded into the rocket company. One share, whole mess. Obviously you’re not a financial analyst.
A trillion dollars. The Dude makes himself another White Russian and abides.
He’s just not buying the stock.